Love

The love is a feeling towards a being similar or not to oneself. It is the proclamation of an animal instinctive force which consists in sticking to one or more individuals: for the Man in a moral or eager way. He can be controlled by Humaine morals and become a kind of passion where the sexual desire does not intervene. One can then call that an love affair. Or then the love is not controlled at all and the Man obeys his primary education instinct which is the reproduction: the love becomes an impulsive desire then where the Human one will not seek to be demolished.

The love can be, according to the person: weak, extremely, obsessif or painful. According to these criteria, it can be more or less controlled by Humaine morals.

A complex concept

The love is a complex concept discussed since centuries and still discussed nowadays. Is this concept a subject of Médecine (why love), of Psychologie (impact of the love and its absence), of Sociologie (its role in the human relations), of Philosophie (in which goal to like?), of Theology (love of god), of Art (love in all its arts), of Entertainment (pleasures of the love) and of economy (trade of the meeting in love).

In ancient Greece

love What we indicate under the term of love, recovers three feelings distinct from the ancient Greece: the Eros , the philia , and the reunion .

  • the philia approaches the friendship such as one hears it today, it is a strong reciprocal regard between two people of close social statuses. It could exist at the time only between two people of the same sex, because of inequality between the sexes. It is an extension of the Amitié.

  • the Eros indicates sexual attraction, the Désir. It is one of harmful passions which the épithumia in the Platonic thought produces. However it could mix with the philia through the Pédérastie.

  • the reunion is the love of next, a univocal relation which one would bring today closer to the Altruisme. It is characterized by its spontaneousness, it is not a considered act or a form of Politesse but real a Empathie for the others which they are unknown or intimate. In the Christian tradition of the Fathers of the Church, this word is compared to the concept of Charité, although this one is closer to a material relation established with people in suffering. The original reunion revêt not this moral Connotation of responsibility in front of a divine authority .

Philosophical topic

To live of love and fresh water is an ideal dreamed by some. Neither war nor labor; only love. ( Peace and love ). Pleasure of non-violence, the seduction, the erotism and the sexual entertainments.

The love is a topic approached with depth by philosophy. For example, to answer this question: the Man is it with the source of the love which he or the love is saw a natural concept which is binding on the man?

Basic component of the religions

All the Religion S treat love.

The love of God and its next is the principle founder of the Christian Religion. The companies Judeo-Christians are strongly marked by this religious notion of the love. The love of god is the force which pushes an individual to have the faith in its God. The Théologie is the speciality which deals with this subject. The love of next is defined as the force which pushes an individual to seek peace and the division with the others. The desire of love results in that to be with the different ones, that to agree to receive others and to give to the others, that to dialog, food with, to include/understand, accompany, etc

Love and family

The family is a place rich in love affairs: marital love, parental love, subsidiary love, phratry.

The importance of the affection of the members of the same family between them is illustrated by the emotion lived in the great events such as a birth, a Mariage, a success, a test, an accident, a Décès.

Love defined by its opposites

The contrary feelings with that of the love would be the Haine, the Peur, even the indifference.

But it is also said that a very thin border separates from hatred a love become passion. For example, the fact of not being liked can cause a feeling of revenge towards the liked object.

The love is a powerful feeling, an intense emotion, even an impulse. The indifference is thus antagonistic love. That which is indifferent is not indeed, in any manner, receptive and attentive with the other.

The love which attracts the beings the ones towards the others opposes then to the fear which moves away from/to each other (hatred being a destroying love).

The other is not love, it acts by interest of the other. The love was, but it is not. Where is the love: in the defect and the contrary absolute.

Love and art

At all the times, the love, “only obsession that everyone wishes”, inspired the artists of all disciplines. It is a recurring and major artistic topic with the time which passes and its two consequences: ageing and the Dead.

In the visual arts

The love was always one of the topics of predilection in the history of painting, that it is by the representation of people in situation in love or by the symbolic system or the allegory, for example by representing scenes utilizing mythological characters.

Certain topics or mythological characters or histories often return at the point to become guns about it:

  • Eros (or Cupid), god of the profane loves, is very often represented. Child or teenager mischievous and capricious, it is winged and carries an arc with which it draws from the gold arrows in the heart of the human ones, which brings love and desire to them. He is represented either in scenes where he is the principal subject, or like supporting character to evoke the symbolic system presence of the love.

the scenes most represented are: love of Eros for Psyché, the turbulent child Eros disarmed by his mother Venus, victory of the love over human works (see the celebrates version Caravage) or the fight between the profane love and the crowned love.

  • Aphrodite (or Venus), goddess of the love, mother of Eros/Cupid, often inspires the painters, in particular for the episode of its birth. It appears in the world already adult, naked and outgoing of the sea: the versions of Botticelli (cf Venus birth), Cabanel, Fantin-Latour or Bouguereau count among most famous.

  • the tumultuous love life of Zeus/Jupiter also was the subject of many representations: the removal of Léda, Europe or Ganymède are among the topics most often treated.

  • the great stories of love of the history or the literature like Tristan and Yseult, Romeo and Juliette, Ulysses and Pénélope and well of others were often treated in painting, especially during the romantic time (Préraphaélisme, Romantisme, etc).

In addition, many scenes in love with the daily life with the men were represented, since the court made with the being loved with the drama in love, while passing by the languorous kiss or libertinage. An example is the table of Fragonard named the Bolt .

In the literature

The poetic Art and the Romance are, with the Chanson, some of the means of predilection of the verbal expression of the love.

Through the ages the literature reflected tendencies of the love, mythological divinities with the realistic love of our time.

Psychological interpretations of the love

Psychism

On the psychic level, the Psychanalyse considers that the first relations relative S Enfant S are determining in the Esprit of a person and her perception of the love. The relations Mother - wire or father - girl, in particular, are particularly outstanding. The relations parent-children are generally unbalanced: the relative meets the needs for the child. One says in this case that the love of the child is captatif and that of the parents oblatif.

While growing the child would learn how to rebalance these relations. This training can fail such or such moment, and the adult will keep a lack of maturity of it if it does not take of it conscience and a more or less wounded perception of the love. The relations of his/her parents between them would be also important in the construction of this idea of the Love.

To fill a lack

The love can be perceived primarily as the search of a lack, when the oblative concept did not develop.

The love which one carries to a person or an object is born by what it brings to us or is likely to bring to us. " Aimer" would not be other than an unconscious way to acknowledge its own impotence with autonomy for a need particular to a given moment. Need to like or need to feel liked would not be other than an egoistic need, than waiting of the person who could fill the `immaterial lacks' or materials which we would not be able to satisfy by ourselves. For example, in Occident, the need for a child would involve the need for a partner or a companion at our sides, need which nourish a feeling of love or need for love for the person that one waits to conceive this child.

The psychical reality of the need for child would lie more in one need for Sécurité justified apparently by the good of the child: the To nourish and the To accompany towards the Adult age . But this attitude, apparently generous, would underlie in fact a desire hidden of the relative to be accompanied towards old age.

In this type of situation, “to like” or say “I am in love ()”, would be an unconscious way to say: “I hope that the person for which I test feelings in love will bring me the things which I await from it”. As long as one feels at the loved person the presence of the things which one awaits from it, the feeling perdure, but if the loved person loses or does not have part of until the other waits, the feeling of love grows blurred or dies out. When this feeling grows blurred, it is not rare to hear: “Our two ways separated” because “my needs changed”, “us did not follow the same road”, etc At this time, the person who feels " in danger" can be prone to crises of anxiety. The left person can be more or less indifferent there; if such is not the case that which is “abandoned” will probably have a feeling of sadness, of Jalousie, Colère or even of Haine…

When this type of relation is analyzed, one is tempted to use reports/ratios proportional and to give a note from 1 to 100 to the love `offered' to the loved person; for example 75; the other person could not like beyond 25… This love affair would be, by definition, unbalanced; if imbalance remains too important, separation becomes the only exit door because the relation becomes unbearable so much for the two parts the reproaches, the arguments are present. It is the person who likes more which would make the most reproaches or would cause the most arguments. The history of love which lasts would be a history in which the `note' of love of the two belligerents would be close to 50, a kind of balance mû by the essential acknowledged or unavowable projects of the two beings which like.

Behaviors in love

Zoology: behaviors in love at the hominoïdes

Zoologiquement, the sexual life and the behavior of the man present many common points with those of the others Primate S, and more generally with the whole of the Mammifère S. the observation of the species nearest to the homo sapiens sapiens , the dwarf chimpanzee of Congo or bonobo ( Pan paniscus ), like that of the other large Singe S, suggests that the love would be only one advanced form of phenomena existing already in our cousins in attenuated form.

Physiologically, the Coït such as one observes it at the Homo sapiens hardly differs from the coupling in the large monkeys. On the other hand, the sequence in love, of the first approaches, the seduction until the coupling, seems to have evolved/moved parallel to the hypertrophy of the cerebral Cortex with which our species during its recent evolution was equipped. The aptitudes for the ideation, imagination, anticipation and with the strategy which result from it complexed the process to the extreme.

The durable attachment, the formation of relatively stable couples is also observed in our cousins, but without reaching the diversity of the individual behaviors, the duration, and the fundamental role of imaginary noted in the human love life.

Another factor which distinguishes us from the monkeys, with enormous consequences, is the quasi constant availability of the human female to the coupling, which does not exist in the other mammals.

The zoologists moreover were interested in the competitive advantage, from the point of view of the species, which gives the love such as it appears at the man. He appears necessary to the security of the couple during the period of extreme vulnerability of the young people, itself followed by the phase of development of the intelligence of an adult, moments which, paid to their equivalents at the close species, are extremely long.

Neurological and biochemical aspect of the feeling in love

The carnal desire, passion in love, are characterized from a biochemical point of view by the release of Phéromone S and the modification of the hormonal rates, this faded state of the spirit, inhibiting in particular the cerebral surfaces associated with the criticism of the other and the trouble, can last over several years.

It is notable that in the animals, for example, an intervention in a natural process as the childbirth disturb the attachment of the female towards its small. Thus, “of the ewes parturients having undergone an anesthesia péridurale do not express a maternal behavior. ”.

Sexual relationships

The love does not differ basically in the various human cultures, the parades of seduction remaining at the base the same ones in Africa, in Orient, Europe or North America. It is rather the attitude with regard to the female desire, whose repression is frequent in many companies (see also Comportement and language), which changes external form.

In general, the parade in love is initiated by the woman, whose attitude expresses in a more or less explicit way its availability. The men try to solicit the women (dredger, Séduction, etc), thus a sexual contact not preceded by a more or less tacit female green light has only little chance to succeed.

This complexity is undoubtedly one of the most obvious demonstrations of the conflict between our nature to be thinking advanced and the reality of the state of nature of animal. The female signs of acceptance are, according to many observations: facial winks, expressions (the smile characteristic, not being had regard to its social function much wider), wrists turned forwards, (sign of extreme vulnerability), contacts, etc the man less often risking with these approaches the first.

The behavior in love in the world

The sexual behavior varies very little according to the various human society. The modes of seduction, of contacts, the facial parades and expressions present only minor and very external differences. Europe does not have any more the monopoly of the massifiée representation of the behavior in love; however, two cinematographic big industries of the world, Western and Indian, show in a seizing way the uniform character of the collective representations of sexuality in different cultures, a fortiori knowing that these two cinemas have each one an area of influence which goes well beyond their own geographical spheres. The Indiens films are for a long time projected in all the cinemas of the Middle East and the Arab world, while the Western cinema for a long time made the conquest of Japan and the zone of Chinese influence.

Nevertheless certain behavioral details are culturally acquired. The kiss with the language, for example, which seems natural in Occident, in China, in the Arab world, in India (civilizations O how much expert out of erotic matters of refinements, of the famous Kâma Sûtra, written by the Brahman Vatsyayana towards the beginning of the Christian era with the tales from the Arabian Nights), was probably unknown in sub-Saharan Africa before the arrival of Europeans. In My secret life , a licencieux anonymity of the time victorienne reports that it had “to learn” this practice, which did not go from oneself. It would be thus about a cultural, minor, but real feature.

The Homosexualité is a behavior attested since highest antiquity and extremely well documented. From a psychological point of view, the love between homosexual does not differ significantly from the love Hétérosexuel.

Internet somewhat modified the love affairs in the world by facilitating the remote contacts. Many couples resulting from different continents were formed thanks to this new media.

Behavior and language

Paradoxically, the most natural act of the world (the reproduction) just like certain body functions (the Défécation) are accompanied at the Man by social interdicts visible with the level by the language and the behavior. There exists in all the human society of the Tabou S relative to these functions: the Man is the only animal which meets in group to eat but isolates itself for déféquer. In the same way, the sex act is done preferably in insulation (the love in group is regarded as deviating). The language is itself impresses of these values morals which distinguish what is " propre" of what is " sale". At all times the Religion S repressed these Pulsion S and made use of their influence on psychism (threat of infinite sufferings in another world…) for better embrigader the credulous ones (see Libertinage, Celibacy, Abstinence) or on the contrary to make of it the center of their philosophy in unquestionable sects (the Gourou allocates all the female group). The language thus distinguishes in undoubtedly all the languages from the world several levels to indicate the Copulation: poetic ( union ), vulgar ( to kiss and an infinity of other terms), medical-scientist ( coitus ) etc Some examples of euphemisms which avoid being too explicit: whereas the expressions to make love , to make coils are unambiguous, one prefers to avoid the direct formulation (shocking) by saying " to sleep with quelqu'un" or even to sleep with somebody in English, put jemandem schlafen in German (whereas precisely it is not question of sleeping!). On the same basis, sich lieben ( to like German ) remains ambiguous and can indicate the feeling as much that the carnal act. The choice of the partner in the final analysis results from a subtle balance between the conscious or cultural attraction (common tastes, literature, music, level of language, richness, social behavior etc) and the unconscious or natural attraction (physics, odor, sense of security for procreation etc).

See too

Literary approaches

  • the novel brittonic anonymous Tristan and Iseut

  • Barthes, Roland, Fragments of a speech in love
  • Cohen, Albert, Beautiful of the Lord
  • Apollinaire, " Mal-aimé" in Alcohols and Poems with Lou
  • Guillaume de Lorrain and Jean de Meung, the Romance of the Rose
  • Pétrarque, Canzoniere
  • Dante, Vita Nova
  • Aragon, Canticle in Elsa
  • Eluard, Last poems of Breton love
  • , insane Love
  • Lord Byron, Don Juan
  • Bruckner, Pascal, the Moon of gall
  • Stendhal, Of the love

Philosophical approaches

Historical approaches

  • Michel Foucault, History of sexuality in three volumes ( Will to know , the Use of the pleasures and the Concern of oneself ), Gallimard, 1976-1984

Sociological approaches

  • Jean Duvignaud, Genesis of passions in the social life , PUF, 1990
  • Zygmunt Bauman, liquid Love. Brittleness of the bonds between the men , Rouergue, 2004
  • Francesco Alberoni, the Shock in love , I love you, all on passion in love , nuptial flight , the erotism .

Approaches religious

Approaches in the song

Many songs evoke the love, with from the various points of view, according to the type-setter or the musical style.

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